Thursday, July 13, 2017

Disappointment and Running: Thinking Out Loud #45

Happy Thursday! This week has been a tough one both mentally and physically and I'd like to say I'm ready for the weekend, but I'm not. I'll explain that more later, but for now let's jump into this weeks thinking out loud

1. The week started off on a frustrating and disappointing note because I got six solid miles in on Saturday, although it wasn't at my goal pace, but I hadn't gotten a really solid run in since the 4th of July so I was incredibly frustrated. However, Monday was just one of those days where nothing was going right. I had to go off a medication that was causing side effects, but now the side effects from going off are even worse, I was having lupus complications, and I was getting ANOTHER blister on my foot. I have this one section of my foot that it just total blister. I've tried taking time off, band aids, moleskin, you name it I've tried it. It was a storm cloud of crappiness that had me feeling pretty frustrated and down. 

2. Thank goodness for puppy cuddles because I swear I'd go insane without a dog. There's been a lot of thunderstorms recently and in the past year Cora has developed an extreme fear of thunderstorms so she's been more cuddly than usual. She's been by my side all week, to which I have no complaints about because she's been giving me lots of extra loving. In between storms we've been making it outside to play frisbee and just to let her run because she has a LOT of energy. 

3. I've said it before and I'll say it again I'm seriously blessed with the most AMAZING group of friends. Watching this guy get up on the wakeboard Sunday was the highlight of my week and I was so incredibly proud of him🙌 He had tried to get up on the 4th of July but he couldn't quite get it, but one try on Sunday and he was up. Learning to balance and maneuver will come in time, but he did awesome I was so excited for him! 

4. Yesterday, after an incredibly crappy morning one of my best guy friends (the same one wakeboarding above) asked if I wanted to go The Cheesecake Factory. It was an immediate yes from me because I love the food and I'd get to spend time with him before he moves across the country😭 I got my favorite item on the menu the lettuce wrap tacos. They are so good and I'm working on creating my own at home. It was nice to hangout, laugh, talk about old times, and just enjoy each others company because our time together is limited. He's been one of my best friends and a rock for me since we met the first day of sixth grade and while I'm sad to see him go I'm happy for him to have such a great opportunity. Be prepared for a visitor in CA😬

5. I shared this quote on instagram, but really it was a reminder to myself. Three miles into my run on Tuesday my knee started hurting so I slowed my pace and at the four mile mark I stopped and stretched it out. At the five mile mark I was in so much pain I could hardly stand on it and I was still a mile from my house. I stopped, rested it for awhile, and started hobbling home. I started feeling semi ok so with 6/10 mile to go I slowly jogged toward home, but when I got home I knew something was very wrong. It was beyond painful to stand and I really couldn't put any weight on it. I immediately iced it and tried to keep off of it for the rest of the day. Wednesday morning I called my doctor and they got me in right away. After some basic stretching she did that had me crying out in pain I was told I had a lateral meniscus sprain that was made worse by lupus. Yay...not😫 She wanted to be extremely aggressive in helping me heal properly, especially since I run so much, so she referred me to a physical therapist and I have my first appointment this afternoon. To say I am crushed by this is an understatement. I was going to run a half marathon on Saturday and it's something I've been working for for seven weeks now, so not being able to run and celebrate all the work I've put in is beyond devastating to me. I try so hard to not let lupus get me down, but this one really got me. I'm going to work my butt off in physical therapy so I can get back out running ASAP and I WILL run a half this year. If anyone has tips on how to heal or take pain away I'm all ears!

I'm going to keep things short this week and end things here. Have a great Thursday and an amazing weekend! 

How do you handle a big disappointment? 
What is your go-to pick me up after a hard day/week?


  1. <3 Dear Rachael, big disappointments are so hard. It's hard because I love to run too, and I think the one thing that I have to cling to is that God does work all things together for good to those that love God, who are the called according to His purpose.

    The amazing thing is that God has so mercifully worked so many hard things for good in my life, and I know He can do that to you too Rach. <3

    Hugs. And I love that you are willing and wanting to pursue physical therapy with such gusto. Your energy for life is absolutely humbling to me, especially because you deal with so much. <3 I see God's glory through you.

  2. I love that quote Rachael! I have to remind myself to "just breathe" often. I'm sorry you are going through this. :( I am really hard on myself, and it takes me a little while to get out of a funk and feeling sorry for myself after a big disappointment. Honestly, by surrounding myself with people that love me, praying, listening to Disney music (which always cheers me up), and trying to turn my negative thoughts into positive ones...I can handle things a bit better. I hope with physical therapy you are able to heal really soon! Xoxo

  3. Oh, I wish I could help you with the pain but once you start to rest and it begins to heal, it'll feel better. My advice is to follow orders to the letter! I guess I was "lucky" in that I had meniscus surgery because both the PT and I had a clear understanding of what was going on and how to proceed but I religiously followed directions and I progressed pretty quickly through the therapy. And now, even though I'm no longer going to PT, I'm still cautious and I pay SUPER close attention to what my knee is telling me. I am stoked that your doctor got you in right away and you didn't have to play the waiting game for too long. That's sometimes the worst part! If you need to vent about your knee or want to talk about what you're doing in PT and what I did in mine, I'm happy to listen and share! Knee injuries are so hard on us runners!!

    I haven't been to a Cheesecake Factory in FOREVER!! Those lettuce wrap tacos look delicious!